Stoplight Self-Check
In the famous (but hopefully not last) words of your latest airline attendant: Place your oxygen mask on before assisting others.
How can you turn this tool into a self-check?
Leading a group is hard — we know that. But you don’t need to do it alone (share with partners in your group and let us support you too!), and you don’t need to do it blindly, unequipped, or limping along.
If the idea of assessing your group’s needs is overwhelming to you, revisit the suggestion to assess your group’s needs with your partners or within your group. But also stop a moment to think through where you are at. That feeling of overwhelm may indicate some areas of your approach are out of alignment or need adjusting.
Spotlight Self-Check
Simply turn the spotlight into a check on your stress levels, leadership challenges, etc. Where are you managing, not managing, and succeeding?
Take a moment to think through these; consider jotting down your thoughts as you go.
Red = Where are you not managing the stress? Make an immediate change to not just alleviate stress but to address your core patterns that lead back to it.
Yellow = Where are you stressed but able to manage? Make one small change to reduce the friction or increase your recovery.
Green = Where are you managing and feeling fulfilled? Take notice of the passions, patterns, or people who are helping you in this area.
Notice a few things about each area:
In the red, I did not aim your attention at alleviating stress.
Stress is an indicator on your dashboard that says something isn’t working; if you simply alleviate stress, you turn off an indicator without addressing what’s not working. (We all have different ways of alleviating through distraction, consumption, blame-shifting, avoidance, and so on.) Your red lights are on because of core issues or root causes that need dealing with.
In the yellow, I did not say “watch” but make one small change.
We often sense slight stresses or frictions and allow them to remain out of tiredness, convenience/inconvenience, and so on. (Think of that “thing” in your house that you could fix, and maybe should fix, but dealing with its minor inconvenience repeatedly feels less challenging than the project it would take to really fix it!)
The energy required to make wholesale change may feel too large to take on right now, but consider (1) how that yellow light issue now may become your next red, (2) how that yellow light issue will sap energy you need to deal with your current red, and (3) how one small change may be enough to get you going in a sustainable way. Your yellow light is an invitation to decrease some friction or pay more attention to your recovery so that the issue doesn’t build into a bigger one.
In the green, I did not simply say “yay” and move on. In the successes or “green areas,” what can you learn and use elsewhere?
We need to take notice of the good we see and experience daily. Psychology now-days has shown in research that negative experiences outweigh positive in our minds; the ancients preferred a daily examen that brought disciples into gratefulness before God for His presence and provision in each day.
Further, what if we didn’t only “take note of” the good but also drew from them some insight about how we could handle stressors, projects, or relationships in other areas of our lives? Notice the patterns of behavior that work for you and apply them to your red and yellow lights. Notice the passions that drive you and apply them to your challenges. Notice the people who help you and use their insights, or directly recruit them, in your challenges too.
